Friday, March 13, 2015

You Suck at Life... PS. Happy Birthday Asshole


You even lie about your birthday.....


Birthday Watch - 2015

Thank you messages? For what, being born?


WAG UPDATE 03-17-15
Kal Korff:  Honestly, it was just an accidental photo, actually from video. I was walking out into a hall touring a woman's home where she had done some reconstruction work on it she wanted to show me. I was fixing dinner for seven women who invited me to cook for them in Prague and this was just a frame grab. Had a great time, enjoyed the cultural exchange. I love the Czech people and interacting with people all over the world. Living outside the USA I get to do this automatically each day, I am grateful to God for the blessings. These nice ladies were readers of my column, so that's why I got the invitation. 'm stuck with this face regardless, and my father has the nerve to look just like me!
Why not post a new photo Korff....
... oh, this is why. Moobs.

56 comments:

I'm not a robot. said...

The "never sent so many thank you's" is is about the saddest thing I've read here yet. Even made his own birthday card to show everyone how much he cares about himself & just keeps on lying to them. What a loser.

Anonymous said...

Did you know kal is on IMDB?!

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm7168780/?ref_=tt_cl_i5

"They Weren't Green" said...

What a humbling honor!

Jimmy D said...

I loathe and despise you, Kalvin. How I wish I had bumped into you while you were still in Prague.

Anonymous said...

Interesting use of commas there, Korff:

Oh boy!
Seven women, will be our next guests, for our next free Expres Dinner, which will be served tonight at approximately 6:30PM.

You illiterate buffoon>

Stop_LYING_Korff!!! said...

The lies. The endless, pointless lies.

Jimmy D said...

Kalvin, look at those photos: you have aged 20 years in five years. You are not a well man, "Colonel". Diabetes? Or just junk food and lack of exercise?

I don't believe you have long left, Kalvin. I await your obituary with interest. I certainly intend to take a holiday.

Anonymous said...

Kalvin Karlton Korff; a life wasted.

Jimmy D said...

"Colonel" Kalvin Karlton Korff, a Sapstoe in the Special Secret Services.

Why do you never talk about that anymore, Kal? Hmmm?

Anonymous said...

WAG FaceBook Update March 23, 2015

The book or series of books gets a mention....

Kal Korff: During the first Gulf War, the USS Missouri used to sit out of range of Saddam's artillery and pelt it from some 25 miles away. I've always found artillery interesting, in my upcoming six book series I cover the work of Dr. Gerald Bull and his supergun. Fascinating stuff.

I'm not a robot said...

A fraud, or series of frauds.

"They Weren't Green" said...

A humbling honor, or series of honors.

Anonymous said...

Moobs, moobs, ha, ha, ha!

Jimmy D said...

He's not a well man.

Dead man walking. Telling ya.

Anonymous said...

A bit over 200 days since the last book lie.

He promises, then he breaks that promise and never mentions it again.... until the next promise.

Jimmy D said...

" ... it was just an accidental photo, actually from video ...

---Now just what the frick is *that* supposed to mean, "Colonel"?

Anonymous said...

Kal Korff: I think contacts lenses, unless absolutely medically necessary, are a stupid idea. Oh what vanity some people have. Eyes were not meant to have stuff on them except what the come with. Why not stick something in your ear? It's not meant to have something stuck on it either.

Anonymous said...

No, Kal, vanity is snapping a screenshot of yourself from an 8 year old video to find a complimentary image then claiming it was an "accidental photo", as if your hand had no role in selecting it. The grab just made itself, then selected itself, then posted itself. You had nothing to do with it, just happily benefitting from the randomness of it all like the cheerful, sincere and down to earth hunk you really are.

Anonymous said...

So is he still the headmaster of the little exploited 3rd world children's school, using stock pictures supplied by the web hoster (as he would call them) to make it look like he's taking advantage of dumb Indians too stupid to Google his name? Or is it just the unpaid "foreign journalist in the newsroom" fantasy these days? From what I was seeing last time Korff produces about one article every other week, usually about something he's obsessed with which happens to be topical news.

And is he still married to a princess from the magical kingdom of make believe?

Anonymous said...

Okay Mooby, still an "Idjit" I see. Good job. How is that S-3 shit coming along? Any paintball games lately? Still eating with the troops? Giving away any Ipads ... for peace? Your genius son winning any school awards? Hows about that Princess wife? Hmmm???

Anonymous said...

WAG FaceBook Update – March 31, 2015

Kal Korff: Good for Monica Lewinsky

Monica Lewinsky and Jon Ronson on How Social-Media Shaming Turns Us All into Bullies

Anonymous said...

Well, well, well ... it is almost 208 days PAST DUE on the publication of that book or series of books Lard Ass. Any updates on when they will be out yet? Too busy jamming your pudgy face with junk food, huh? Okay Colonel Fat Ass ... Okay.

Anonymous said...

Just a real quick question there Mr. Moobs, have you figured out the difference between

a Vile or

a Vial?

Just wondering ...

Anonymous said...

Ha, ha, ha!!!

Anonymous said...

Mooby Dick....

Anonymous said...

McFackface, Easter is here and where are you? The land of fecal and urine.

Perfect karma for a life misspent.

FN

Anonymous said...

WAG FaceBook Update:

So Korff finally posted a direct link to his "article". He normally posts an image of the .PDF.

In the end, over and 18 hour period, 8 people Liked, about the same posted a message; and meaningless message.

Way to go McFuckface.


Kal Korff: Hi everyone. I'm honored and humbled to report that I have three articles in today's newspaper, Daily Post India, which is an English language nation daily read by hundreds of thousands of people each day. In today's issue there are three pieces: the usual analytical column "Kal's Korner" on the International page, another travel piece in the LifeStyle page, and a full page article as a Sunday Special on Obama's proposed Iran deal. This is the Sunday special piece, hope you enjoy it.

Howard Konikoff: Kal, when you post your articles, can you also post the url so it can be read on a phone?

Kal Korff Hi, yes, I'll try to remember to do so, thanks for asking.

http://dailypost.in/dp-on-sunday/41963-world-impact-iran-s-nuclear-deal

Jimmy D said...

Your views, please, Professor Korff:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3025466/Was-19th-Century-Siberian-apewoman-yeti-6ft-6in-Russian-serf-outrun-horse-not-human-according-DNA-tests.html

Anonymous said...

Moobs said:

Kal Korff: Hi everyone. I'm honored and humbled to report that ...


Holy Shit!! Honored and humbled all in the same fucking post!! Who would a thunk it?

"They Weren't Green" said...

It must be humbling to be so honored for so little.



Your problem, Kalvin, is that you do not comprehend the difference between tricking people into praising you for your hollow bullshit, and actually feeling proud about something you accomplished on your own. That's sad.

Anonymous said...

Oh, you gobble Korff... and you swallow.

Kal Korff: As Steve Jobs used to say whenever he thought people were talking nonsense, "Gobble, gobble, gobble"

Anonymous said...

Everyone else promptly forgot it.

stop_LYING_Korff!!! said...

it's a good job there is no death penalty for serial liars.

Anonymous said...

Kalvin, no-one gives a flying one for Bigfoot, or Roswell, or the weird Swiss guy with his flying saucers.

In each case, they are clearly amateur hoaxes (guy dressing up in a gorilla suite, kitchenware suspended from clearly visible threads, etc.) perpetrated by whack jobs.

Couldn't you concentrate on ending starvaation, or bringing about world peace, or something more worthwhile?

Anonymous said...

Well Moobs, ya shure know how to keep a deadline, don't cha? 217 days PAST DUE on your book or series of books. You are a waste of space, flesh, methane and any other damn thing I can think of! Nice Work there Chubby.

"They Weren't Green" said...

What a humbling honor to bestow.

Anonymous said...

Moobs, so fun and so true.

How's it going Moobs?

Jimmy D said...

Hey, Colonel Moobs. Do they sell man bras in India?

Anonymous said...

I guess that would be a Bros! Ha, ha, ha!

Jimmy D said...

I believe the lead singer of Iron Maiden used to sport a flame-throwing codpiece.

Maybe Colonel Moobs could design a nanobot-launcher bros?

Anonymous said...

Watcha think, Moobs?

Moobs ...?

Anonymous said...

Well Colonel "Moobs" Korff, have you called anyone's employment recently in an attempt to get them fired or dismissed? Have you taken any photographs of your "genius level son" at school receiving any academic honors? How about traveling to the Pakistan border to "dine" with the troops?

You know Moobs, you have left a huge footprint in the last few years with your special brand of "crazy" and if you try to walk away from this, you WON'T! There are witnesses out here in web-land that have simply been waiting to tell their stories ... and when they do ... "well things will be bad for Kal Korff, real bad." Remember that Moobs? If you don't we sure do. "It is going to be real bad for Kal Korff, real bad. I am sure glad I'm not Kal Korff. Real glad.

Anonymous said...

Never happened.

Noble World School

July 27, 2014

Hi everyone. We will be starting our iPad and AppleTV driven SmartClasses very shortly, I'll give you an update and post photos and videos of this next milestone in our educational growth and evolution sometime in the next two weeks.

Anonymous said...

An essay on Moobs was sent to the Syndicate recently.

We will post soon... after we get done laughing and screaming and loving every word of it!

Korffing Synicate

Anonymous said...

Well Fellow Korffers, now it is almost 224 days past due on Moobs book or series of books. (And really, no surprise considering what kind of buffoon we are dealing with.)

So, the question is, will it hit a year or more that our Village Idiot will be past due? And, does our Village Idiot KNOW that he is a Village Idiot? I have always wondered that ...

I'm not a robot said...

Another lie, or series of lies.

Anonymous said...

Today's brain vomit... David, it is what it is, as you say.

Logically, it can never be anything else :-)

But it is NOT what you said, which is that it "happened" because we do NOT know that it DID REALLY happen.

This kind of sloppiness with words reflecting what is really projection of preferred beliefs is rampant in the UFO field, and science doesn't work that way; courts do not work that way, business agreements don't work that way and words exist to mean what they do, or they mean nothing at all.

This kind of sloppiness HARMS the UFO field and its "quest" for credibility because if YOU were on a TV show and YOU said "It happened" and a TV Host ASKS YOU "HOW do you KNOP it REALLY happened," your answer, unless you lied (and you won't because you're not that kind of person) is that you really do NOT "know" and that is not the same as "good enough for me."

I think you can only HELP the UFO field as a leader researcher in this area by tightening up your use of language because if you do NOT lead by example on this, others will "follow" what is a wrong example.

Could be never guarantees "is" – if you know what I mean. There is no harm in using the most accurate language possible, in fact the highest professional ethical standards insist on it, don't they?

Anonymous said...

David, as a journalist and reporter and columnist published some 50 times a month, on many different subjects, I have to use words like "alleged" and "purported" and "reported" and "supposed" all the time, unless I can PROVE it.

This is Basic Logic 101 and it is also how our laws work and how science works when it does not know for sure.

Anonymous said...

Mentally ill.

niedermeyer said...

"I was supposedly working on a thesis."

"I was allegedly a colonel and volunteer counter-terrorism analyst in an allegedly privately funded paramilitary group."

"I purportedly have a desk in the newsroom of a media giant."

"My alleged friends purportedly surprised me with a supposed birthday cake, and I didn't even have the common decency to take a picture of them holding it. Just the cake on an empty desk which could have been anywhere. I am such a worthless fucking liar."

The Unknown Korffer said...

LOL coded data? More on this please!

Anonymous said...

as i recall colonel cupcake had claimed (2011 or thereabouts?) that he inserted markup code into the page data for his online newspaper articles which rendered them invisible to search engines. a lie to cover the fact that he does not publish 10,000 articles a year or whatever ridiculous number he humblebrags to his facebook crowd about. real journalists do want people finding their articles and sharing the links. not kal korff.

Anonymous said...

Yes, that is right. It's on the web site someplace.

Korff didn't want to post on Facebook the name of his media giant because he knew Korffers would start e-mailing them, etc. After we found it, by searching Korff's name in India, Korff said it was public knowledge, etc., and not hard at all to find. It wasn't, it's klassic Korff.

In the end, Korff was trying to float the lie that he had the talent to hide the articles from search engines AND from Korffers.

Of course, why would his media giant allow him to hide the material they are, evidently, paying for.

Way to think it through Korff.

Jimmy D said...

Kalvin, I just received the following warning through my email (will this have the reverse effect of turning up the stories that you have hidden?)

"Non-Responsive Site? Google Doesn't Love You Anymore...
You may have already heard the news that April 21 marked the day that some people are calling "webageddon". Google's new algorithms are going into effect, meaning that if your site is not responsively coded it will no longer be indexed by Google, and will automatically be buried in searches below sites that are responsive."

Anonymous said...

230 days and .... silence on your book, or series of books.

How it must feel to promise and break those promises over and over again.

Anonymous said...

WAG FaceBoiok Update

Kettle black.... asshole

Kal Korff: She is NOT "trustworthy" she proved it again over her email scandal which is being ignored by her promoters because they refuse to admit the truth.

http://nypost.com/…/majority-of-voters-think-hillary-is-un…/