Saturday, January 24, 2009

Kal Korff can't comprehend the meaning of a simple word

It isn't anything new and examining the past writings of misanthrope Kal Korff you probably will find yourself asking how in the universe could Kal ever claim to be some sort of English teacher??? Just look at a recent example of what has been arecurring problem for Kal and his English "skills". Kal Placed this very thing on his Internet website today "but uddering lies never deters such people."

Now I do not claim to be any sort of skilled English teacher or writer at all and I know my writing simply sucks. But how in the hell could anyone who claims to be an English "teacher" cannot tell the difference between the words "utter" and "udder"???????? there are five year ols who know the what an udder is!!

Kal needs to go back and get some sort of education beyond his only educational accomplishment which is only high school. Let me give you some education here Kal, you fucking idiot.

Udder: An udder is the mammary organ of female cattle and some other mammals, including goats and sheep. You know Kal, the big round thing under a cow with the four little things sticking out?

Utter: This has a few meanings Kal so be sure to pay attention. I know how hard it is for you to do more than one thing at a time. Utter generally means total or absolute. It can also be used to refer to speech.

Now please stop making more of an ass out of yourself than you already have Kal. I know it is hard for you not to act like a complete fucking idiot all the time but please do try to control yourself, you self assuming, uneducated piece of trash.

One more thing Kal. There is no such word as "kritic". It does not exist anywhere in any English dictionary, slang or otherwise. Stop making words up or trying to inject words into the vocabularies of unsuspecting Europeans. Especially words you are making up Kal. Stop lying about the proper use of words. There is no "k" in critic. There ever had been and never will be. Just because you silly name has the letter "k" in it does not give you the right to slaughter the English language, both spoken and written. Just stop you loathsome dolt. You are truly fooling yourself Kal if you actually believe your are that important. You aren't and the world would not blink if you fell off the face of this planet tomorrow.

You know Kal that you can take remedial English classes to improve your obviously lack of knowledge in this area since you are representing yourself as some sort of expert in this area, which you clearly are not. I could go on with any number of examples of Kal's ridiculous writings that are easily available in books and on the Internet but I think everyone has a good idea of how incompetent Kal is when it comes to most things. this is pretty bad when I have to point out English mistakes to someone. but then again we are talking about Kal Korff here.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

I always knew Kal was a fucktard, but how in the hell can you not know the difference between udder and utter? HOW?!?! Did Kal even finish grade school let alone high school? Kal, you're an utter dunce. See? That's how the word is properly used.

Kal Korff, you have to be kidding me here. I wonder how long it is until Kal frantically gets to a keyboard and corrects it. Good thing I saved a copy of the website and I'm sure KIAI also did the same.

Anonymous said...

This is another one of his "tests" people. He's testing us to see if we will react to this.

Kal reads this site, and many times per day.

I think the host should share with us just how many times per day by looking at his IP attached to the e-mail address, etc.

I ain't no genius at this puter stuff but I know it can be done.

Anonymous said...

KKK has some deal about his new Billy Meier - Horn - Kan O Korff DVD up on his site.

In his, SELF INTERVIEW, KKK states that he is in his apartment in:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basel-
City

Anyway:

>>> While we are NOT optimistic that UFO hucksters like Kevin Randle will finally admit the TRUTH about Roswell, we will see how much LONGER Kevin Randle REMAINS A COWARD, and REFUSES TO DEBATE, independent of terrorist threats," explained Korff.

Developing.... <<<

Not much to say here but KKK is a Fuck Nut. A fuck nut that RAN AWAY from the last debate with Kevin R. The truth hurts, Fuck Nut.

>>> We hope that the Bill Gates Foundation will now DONATE MONEY TO CURE THIS DEADLY BACTERIA, which CAN BE DEFEATED, IF AND WHEN PEOPLE "CARE ENOUGH" TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Hey Fuck Nut, why don't YOU give up some of the 25 million that Saudi dude gave you, or better yet, use some of the monies made from the 500 book deal, Fuck Nut.

>>> especially since we have WITHDRAWN our support for Mr. Vojtek Sedlacek <<<

Thank God! Finally some positive action from the, Fuck Nut.

>>> Public exposure, especially where it concerns people who make a point to hate, is always best. <<<

Finally a point we can agree on Fuck Nut. How's this blog doing Fuck Nut? Calling you out, over and over again; no book deal, no 25 million, no audits, no law suits....

I must tell the group here that this Korff "investigation" is a wonderful activity.

Nothing better could be done with our time, helping to expose this Fuck Nut to the world.

The internet is so wonderful. Back in the '90's, we couldn't go after guys like this in such an immediate way. These people would go on and on, making claims and threatening people, ad nauseam, and we could do little about it.

Now, your past, you’re present, and your future, yes Mr. Fuck Nut, your future, is in OUR HANDS!

We own you Fuck Nut.

So fucking great!!!! Haaaaaaaaaaa!

Swallow the load Mr. Fuck Nut! Swallow the load and taste the sticky goodness of, karma!!!! KARMA!!!!!!!!!!

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Capt Tampon, out

Anonymous said...

And:

>>>Formal Complaint Against Security Officer Royce Myers III Lands Monday in Eugene, Oregon! <<<

Not true.

Make the call yourself. Simple as that.

This is another example of a surly little man, trying to get a rise out of a good and proper man, who did good and proper work and who WILL NOT respond to KKK.

And this action taken by the ufowatchdog, to NOT respond, IN ANY WAY to the loonyness of KKK, infuriates KKK.

Kal K. Korff, “I am right God damn it and Royce Meyers III can not just sit back and ignore me!”

He, he… Don’t you just love this.

Anonymous said...

WTF? I guys KKK stands for Kal Koo Koo. I feel sorry for Kal's mom. The poor lady must be sick over all of this bizarre behavior her kid is publicly displaying. How sad.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha!! What laughs! This is more entertaining then a barrel of monkeys. "Fuck Nut" LOL!! :D


"The internet is so wonderful. Back in the '90's, we couldn't go after guys like this in such an immediate way. These people would go on and on, making claims and threatening people, ad nauseam, and we could do little about it."

Funny you mention this, as I was thinking about Kal K. Korff's fall from grace between about 1998 to 2004, when he got wrapped up his his Bigfoot lunacy. We've often speculated on why the professor fled to Europe and Prague in particular. He didn't just close his eyes and throw a dart at a map. Most likely he had made a connection with someone there (Michaela Kocis?) and relocated to be near this person.

But maybe he was also trying to flee how technology was starting to encroach on his ability to scamjob his way into TV appearances, lecture circuits, dinners with the President or what have you. One is tempted to say that between 1998 and 2004 Kal K. Korff sort of bottomed out. But maybe in reality he was bottomed out all along and he was just able to keep the lid on it for just so long. As the end of the millennia and the proliforation of information sharing networks grew his ability to conceal the true nature of his status became more & more tenuous. A motivation for heading to Czech Republic may have something to do with Kal K. Korff observing that they were about five or ten years behind the curve. Sure they have the internet and email, but from Czech Republic he could conceivably keep his secrets better than he could in North America. There is also a language barrier issue that can be exploited in keeping information hidden or difficult to access just because of dialect issues.

Slowly even CR is catching up and I agree: Colonel Kumquat must be getting worried about how easy it is now for anybody located anywhere on the planet to check up on his claims. I'm sure that Kal K. Korff's primary reason for leaving North America and relocating to Prague is simple and most likely involves a woman, since no woman in their right mind here in North America would have anything to do with him. Especially one that's young and somewhat easy on the eyes like Michaela Kocis or Martina Tycova. In Europe, however, Americans have a bit of a mystique about them that he's doubtlessly exploited.

But I wonder if he also exploited how CR's information systems are somewhat inaccessible to sleuthers on other parts of the globe. He really can be whoever or whatever he wants over there, make up any horse assed story about himself, and pretty much rest assured that because he's from the US it will be difficult for the locals to check up on his claims. And equally difficult for us here in the new world to try and ascertain just what he's doing over there. Perhaps he's already planning to relocate to South America or Southeast Asia, which would be the next logical step back in terms of information networks.

Keep the laughs coming, this is one of the funniest entries in this blog so far.

Anonymous said...

Lots of topics in Kal's latest articles. What stood out for me was the apparent 'professional' seperation between Korff and Mr. Sedlacek, but that's what you get Kal when you order Mac hardware and sent the bill to Mr. Sedlacek. Funny how you state that it was somehow Sedlacek's fault for "being an individual and not an institution". Pure unadulterated smokescreening bullshit if you ask me.

Next Milos Bartu from Cables&Simms (where Korff got Mac hardware but sent the bill to Mr. Sedlacek) is "not telling the whole truth", according to Korff. Naturally impending lawsuits and other threats accompany Korff's actions. As always Korff has done nothing wrong and all those other folks need to be exposed for 'faulty people' they are. And it's not personal.

This moron Korff will never change. He's severely psychologicly damaged.

Anonymous said...

More comedy!!

I've been perusing the Bigfoot Forums which you can find here:

http://www.bigfootforums.com/index.php?

doing a keyword search for Kal Korff will result in some very eye opening and amusing discussion threads, including posts made by the professor himself. His approach is the same, fostering conflict and issuing threats & accusations rather than engaging in a meaningful discussion of the phenomenon at hand. He was also trying to sell Greg Long's Book, "The Making of Bigfoot", which solves the mystery of the well known Patterson-Gimlin movie of Bigfoot. According to Long and the professor's "research", the answer is that the film was faked (surprise surprise) by using a run of the mill gorilla suit. And as usual, they expect you to actually buy their book to learn of these fascinating events. Published by -- surprise surprise! -- Prometheus, with an Amazon.com Sales Rank of #830,499 in Books, and as usual pumped by Kal K. Korff as "the best selling book ever" on the bigfoot phenomenon, which as usual is incorrect. Greg Long and Kal K. Korff have since had a falling out over money (plus the unconvincing nature of their recreation, which I have seen and is ridiculous to say the least) and the primary "witness" offering their proof, a chap by the name of Bob Hieronimous, who supposedly wore the ape suit during the shoot, actually did sue Mr. Long (though I am not sure yet if he was successful, I will keep reading).

That's the setup. Now for the laughs. The lynchpin of Mr. Long and Colonel Cornmuffins' "proof" was apparently a photograph of an identical suit used for the original filming. First here's a frame from the Patterson-Gimlin film of Bigfoot that will probably look familiar to most anyone, and my apologies of the picture URLs come out as incomplete:

http://www.cryptomundo.com/wp-content/patterson_bigfoot_lg.jpg

Please remove any beverages from your tabletop and swallow whatever may be in your mouth and make sure you aren't leaning too far back in your chair. Here is Long and Kal K. Korff's photograph of what they say is the exact same ape suit:

http://www.bigfootforums.com/uploads//post-3-1079518847_thumb.jpg


O:

Anonymous said...

Well, Kal's site isn't loading, so I can't see his latest written diatribe, but the video is comedy gold. "Kal" is short for "Kalisrael"??? WTF??? Does he not realize that, a), No one in the history of the planet has been named "Kalisrael" and, b), his birth record with his given name "Kalvin" are available online?? Kal, do you just make stuff up on the spot without thinking it through???

Damn, the gay Nazi pig-man is slipping further and further down the rabbit hole

Anonymous said...

A message from Kal on my youtube:

Hi f1racer,

the word udder refers to comments made by people who make no sense, as if they came from the udder of a cow.

that would be you.

the spelling was correct, and it was technically accurate.

obviously you do not like to have your "deep" emails published, because it shows how you really are. You won't stop us, especially since they are ALL now being put into a FREE downloadable book which will be available to the world soon.

tomorrow we close the books on you with the police.

expect tomorrow for the case file number to be published, and names of the officers.

have a great day.

do NOT respond to this, or we will ADD IT to your large file with them.


ROFL WHAT A LOON!!

F1 racer

Anonymous said...

Regarding the new youtube video...

(For you new people, just search out Kal Korff on youtube and then it up Secret Wars and enjoy.)

Another SELF INTERVIEW, with no AUDIANCE, done, last week or yesterday.

Listen to what Fuck Nut says. CLOSELY. He betrays his time-line again and again.

EXAMPLE: Fuck Nut say's that he’s “already said to much” in regards to his new post where he will write Kal’s Korner, once again, stating that,

“thankfully this interview will air… years later, when I’m done with the book, and ready….”

Whew, is it getting thick in here or is it just Fuck Nuts over bearing ego smelling up the place?

Like a time travel move, T2, as an example, it's very hard to keep your facts and TRUTHS in order...

when bouncing around, willy, fucking, nilly, to, and fucking fro, and messing about the timeline of your already made up past, present and future!!!

Mr. Fuck Nut, with bags under your eyes, grey bread and ever expanding waistline.

Every move watched.

Every action reported upon.

We own you Fuck Nut!

Keep checking in here;

Kalvin K.

Fuck Nut

Korff.

Developing…

Anonymous said...

Kal won't close the book on anyone. Kal needs to have enemies to fulfill all of his paranoid fantasies. And as predicted by KIAI, Kal offered the lamest excuse for his utter misuse of the word udder. This is something a child would do. I think that developmentally Kal has not grown at all since the early 1990s.

As proof of this you can just read his old web posts on message boards and his articles. His behavior hasn't changed at all and he still threatens people from every angle he possibly can.

Anonymous said...

The thing about Kal and these threats is that Kal is hoping and praying that he is able to find something he can use to file a lawsuit or complaint against someone. The crazy fuckwad will do it if he has a good enough opportunity to do it. Of course any complaint or lawsuit filed by Kal has no credibility, but Kal can come out and proclaim to the world, "See! I told you it WOULD HAPPEN!" Again, any lawsuit or complaint would be meaningless to even someone with marginal intelligence, but Kal would trumpet it as some kind of victory. I hope Kal files a complaint against Randle, Meyers, or anyone else Kal is stalking. If I were an employer and Kal called me, a five minute Google search would tell me everything I needed to know. To those Kalis threatening, the best thing you cando is laugh in his pathetic face. Assholes like Kal thrive on this sort of thing because he feels like he has some sort of power. Kal has no power over anyone. Hell, eventhe guy at McDonald's treats Kal like shit.

Anonymous said...

Is Kal's claim he used the word udder correctly just... wait for it... udder nonsense?

Sorry. I couldn't help it.

Anonymous said...

So Kal is currently in his apartment in Basle, Switzerland.
Uhhh... Kal, it's Basel. Don't you know where you're at?
Is Martin Tycova actually going to 'produce' the 2 disc DVD set of you and Michael Horn? Not according to Michael Horn, that's HIS line of business! Still trying to take credit for someone else's work? Sounds familiar.

Anonymous said...

Regarding Kal's timeline - at about 6:45 into his new video, he says he was in Seattle with 'family' on New Year's Eve. That would have been the eve of Jan. 31, 2000.
As far as the rest of the interview with the camera, (although it sounds more like a theraputic session with a psychiatrist), if you read between the lines a bit, you can see where he has, quite emotionally, revealed some good reasons why he is the way he is. Rejected by his father, later by most of his siblings. A classic broken childhood case. So to show Dad and the others how worthy he is, he tries to make himself 'famous' by any means possible.
But the clincher is his own words...'trying to find out who I am and where I came from'!

Dr. Hu

Anonymous said...

Dr. Hu, thank you for this.

If you are a real doctor, do you have any thoughts on how we should proceed?

While fun, this Korff bashing might end in a sad way.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't worry to much about it. He's not going to hurt himself, though he looks like shit in that video. Old, tired, and bloated.

Kal won't close the book on anyone. Kal needs to have enemies to fulfill all of his paranoid fantasies. And as predicted by KIAI, Kal offered the lamest excuse for his utter misuse of the word udder. This is something a child would do. I think that developmentally Kal has not grown at all since the early 1990s.

Interesting post! Yes, Kal K. Korff is defined by his enemies and conflicts with others, to the point that I don't think he comprehends how offensive most people find his approach to interacting with them. To Kal K. Korff there is nothing out of the ordinary in accusing someone of telling lies, threatening them with legal action, exposing them as a fraud: All just business as usual even to people whom he should consider friends. I think he tried that approach on Greg Long and ended up alienating the guy and losing out on a lot of money from their Bigfoot book sales, since after all it's Long's name on the book.

I'd take Kal K. Korff's arrested development issue back even further. Like a lot of child celebrities or performers who peaked out during their formative years (think Michael Jackson, for instance) Kal K. Korff appears to have only socially developed to the point he was at when he began his "lecture circuit" work where he was praised & rewarded for giving talks on first UFOs and then JFK, between the ages of maybe 11 and 14.

If you read enough of his more casual prose he has a very juvenile way of relating to concepts like truth, honesty, integrity, loyalty, etc. Look at how he uses the word lie or lies. Everything that he does not recognize as being the way things are can be labeled as a lie by Kal K. Korff, even though quite often he instead means that somebody is not correct with their information. To him that's a lie. Or rather it's a lie to say/write/post anything that does not jibe with Kal K. Korff's own interpretation of reality -- Just like a 12 year old might react.

Everything is also personal to Kal K. Korff. He has absolutely no professional detachment. Any criticism of him is a personal blow filled with lies, and his reaction is to throw a temper tantrum for not getting his way. He threatens people in the same way that a 10 to 12 year old might threaten someone by getting his dad or calling the police for something as insignificant as disagreeing with his conclusions. Reading over those Bigfoot forums there's one mind boggling post that he made where he quite literally says that anybody who disagrees with him is guilty of libel and slander and will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

It's like, come again?? How can just disagreeing with somebody over an issue regarding paranormal interest studies amount to slander? Then what happens is that people see that kind of a reaction and fail to understand that they are essentially dealing with a socially inept former child celebrity who was fawned over and praised rather than forced to grow up and accept responsibility for himself.

His use of language is also bizarre for an adult but as someone else points out very typical of the way that children communicate. Excessive use of caps locks, a preoccupation with himself, unrestrained hostility or mocking derisiveness. You would have a hard time believing than a sober, educated adult wrote some of what I've seen (though it can be effectively argued that Kal K. Korff is not very well educated -- he was too busy with his flying saucer books to pay attention in English class, at least) and this insistence upon the dual meaning of "udder" without making note of having used it as a pun (if he even knows what a pun is) sounds like a 12 year old getting caught for having made a stupid mistake and insisting no, you are wrong and my so-called mistake was right, and you are lying and slandering me by pointing out my mistake.

I think Kal K. Korff mentally has not developed a fully adult personality. Someone once pointed out that Kal K. Korff isn't crazy par se, but suffering from a personality disorder that makes him prone to delusions, compels him to make grandiose statements about himself that have no basis in fact, and puts himself at the center of the universe. Everything ends up being about Kal K. Korff and he is capable of doing or has done everything, with his list of accomplishments constantly changing to fit whatever mood he is in. If you read a self written bio about him it's not just a little padded, it's ABSURD, with accolades, honors and accomplishments that even Carl Sagan, Neil Armstrong, Rod Serling and John Lennon couldn't hope to boast of if they were all rolled into one person. Kal K. Korff has literally done everything, is capable of doing anything, and his honors exceed anything that anybody else could possibly hope for. Which is exactly how a boasting, braggadocious 11 year old kid behaves. Immature and delusional.


I can't even watch this video all the way through, it's so pathetically phony. Why would the Israelis have to set up an Israeli flag as part of an interview set just to get the point across that they are in Israel? It's also the same flag seen in all his other videos. We never hear the interviewer speak and it's pretty clear he's the only person in the room. Obviously filmed in Kal K. Korff's apartment one day when he was feeling a little down in the dumps and figured he'd cheer himself up by talking about his favorite subject: himself.

Anonymous said...

Bravo! Your post is spot on about Kal! Kal is a child in an adult's body. So utterly true.

Anonymous said...

Squonkamatic,

Well done my friend. You've boiled down KKK to his very essence, a child. A child stuck at the time between prepubescent to about the time their balls drop and they start masturbating.

Look at his relationships. As best as I can figure, he’s still baiting these women with his me,me, my, my… routine.

Granted, most men will do anything to get a woman into bed, myself included.

However…

KKK goes the extra mile and seems to have no issue at all with making a public spectacle of himself to this “sexual” and “look at me” end, and all of it does seem to stem from his most early “accomplishments”, “accomplishments” he’s still riding on, and CANNOT move beyond, as can be seen in his many video’s, etc.

In any case, thanks Squonkamatic. With your musings, and many of the other, better thought out and well written bloggers whom can be found here, are making good progress dissecting this thing called;

Kal K. Korff.

Capt Tampon

Anonymous said...

Squonk...

Spot on!. That's been my take on Kal for quite some time. A little 12-year old kid trying to muscle in on the grown-up's parties.

(Sorry Kal, you don't belong. Go outside and play!).

Anonymous said...

I'm sure Kal Korff knows how gullible non-English speaking women with no opportunities are.

Too bad for Kal the rest of us aren't as easily duped.

Hey Kal, you are now nearing 50 in age. Time to grow up.

Anonymous said...

Colonel Crackhead must have earned himself a place in some world record for issuing the most legal threats.

Some very good observation smade here about Kal's disconnection to rational adult behavior. Indeed he does act like a child having a tantrum.

Kal telling people he will sue them for slander because they disagree with him tells quite a lot about how Kal views the world.

Anonymous said...

Some fine assessments here about Korff's disfunctional personality. Korff basicly acts like a child, not fully realising how he treats others yet reacting like a raging juvenile when he receives criticism. The constant legal threats to those that disagree with him are also a clear sign of adolescent bully tactics.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I missed this.

Located under Kalvin's bloated head shot is this, NOW classic, PROOF OF EVIDENCE that Kalvin K. Korff does, publicly state, for the record, and on the record, that he, Mr. Fuck Nut Supreme, is a.....

DIRECTOR

#16 - Most Viewed (Today) - Directors - Czech Republic
#59 - Most Viewed (This Week) - Directors - Czech Republic

You didn't have to choose this "title" of "Director" Kalvin. You could have chosen an number of titles:

Youtuber
Director
Musician
Guru
Reporter

Nope. You made a conscious decision to pick, Director.

It doesn’t get any clearer than this Kalvin.

Let the public record show...

When you, Kalvin, stated that there is no evidence that F1 could point to, to call you out on this pathetic excuse for an argument...

You Lied. Because YOU chose the title....

YOURSELF

Anonymous said...

Kal finally figured out how to delete all his YouTube comments.

Don't worry, Kal, we never forget....